Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Rana Sanaullah is an ugly version of Ilzam Khan

Punjab Law Minister, Rana Sanaullah is apparently an ugly version of Ilzam Khan and even consider himself to be on top of a containing while addressing media.

Monday, August 24, 2015

Aik He Saf Main Kharay Ho Gaey Aslam o Ayaz

In his verdict for cases of NA-122, PP-147 and PP-148, Justice Kazim Malik of Election Tribunal has asked Ayaz Sadiq of PMLN to stand besides Main Aslam of PTI and declared that both candidates of opposing parties somehow managed to rig General Election 2013 on same place at same time.

The information presented above is Fictitious, however, it is offered in Good Faith and Mostly Correct to the best of our knowledge. If any factual errors have appeared here inadvertently, then we would be pleased to hear from anyone wishing to offer corrections.

Monday, August 17, 2015

Wonders & Blunders of General Hamid Gul

Lieutenant-General (R) Hamid Gul, who has died aged 78, was a former Chief of Inter-Services Intelligence, who became famous as a "Fatherly-Figure" of the Taliban in Afghanistan.

Hamid Gul was commissioned in the Armored Corps of the Pakistan Army in 1958. During the 1965 war with India, he served as a tank commander, in one of the largest tank-battles in history, and was decorated for bravery.

A couple of decades later, General Gul became head of the ISI in 1987 and masterminded a successful guerrilla war against the Soviets in Afghanistan by funneling in armaments to the Mujahideen (some later become the Taliban and Al-Qaeda), that proved instrumental in giving rather warm farewell to the Soviets in Afghanistan.

One of his proudest possessions was a piece of the Berlin Wall, presented to him by the people of the city in gratitude for "delivering the first blow" to the Soviet empire through his use of Jihadi fighters.

General Gul's wonderful fortunes turned around as soon as the Soviets withdrew from Afghanistan, and he started making his share of blunders.

First, as Chief of Pakistan's premier intelligence agency, General Gul was unable to get a sniff of plot to murder President Zia-ul-Haq in plane crash on August 17th 1988, it was indeed an intelligence failure.

A year later, in early 1989, General Gul masterminded the unsuccessful Mujahideen operation to capture Jalalabad from the Afghan Army, an operation which triggered a civil war in Afghanistan that is still being fought in some forms and costed millions of lives. Pakistan not only suffered big from the fall out of Afghan civil war but is giving countless sacrifices till now.

Ostensibly as a result of this failure, General Gul was immediately sacked by Pakistan’s Prime Minister Benazir Bhutto and in 1992 he took early retirement from the Army.

May Allah bless him for his wonders and forgive him for his blunders.

Who rigged Election 2013?

The Haripur by-election result has clearly shown that it was in fact Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf who rigged Election 2013, as Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz votes increased, while Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf votes decreased dramatically.

In what was the first ever experiment of biometric voter verification system in Pakistan, PMLN candidate Babar Nawaz has emerged as the clear winner in the by-election held for the NA-19 constituency, securing a whopping 137,219 votes followed by PTI’s Dr Raja Amir Zaman who ended up with 90,698 ballots to his name.

It is important to note that PTI's Dr Raja Amir Zaman votes decreased from 116579 (in 2013) to 90,698 (in 2015), while PMLN's candidate's votes increased from 114374 (in 2013) to a mammoth 137,219 (in 2015).

PTI's Dr Raja Amir Zaman was declared the winner in 2013, however, Election Tribunal order re-election in 7 polling stations after runner up candidate from PMLN, Omar Ayub Khan, challenged the result. Omar Ayub Khan took the seat in re-polling in 7 polling station.

Later, Supreme Court ordered re-polling in whole constituency, after Raja Amir Zaman challenged the Election Tribunal verdict.

The by-poll result, especailly the large decrease in Zaman's votes, however, has only proved that PTI's Raja Amir Zaman massively rigged the elections in 2013.

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Unidentified batsman fires upon Waseem Akram

One unidentified and unknown batsman, who used to play in Pakistan's domestic circuit decade ago, is suspected to have fired upon Sultan of Swing Waseem Akram to avenge some of fatal deliveries he has received over the years.

The information presented above is Fictitious, however, it is offered in Good Faith and Mostly Correct to the best of our knowledge. If any factual errors have appeared here inadvertently, then we would be pleased to hear from anyone wishing to offer corrections.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Another General sacks another Justice

General Niazi of Pasha's Army sacks Justice Wajih.

Earlier General Mushi tried to sack Justice Chaudhry.

Submit a leave or leave

Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf has only two legal options, either it's members submit (rather belated) leave application for the period they remained absent from the Parliament or simply leave and vacate their seats.

Instead it seems that Parliament is a ring, just like the one in Lord of the Ring, and no one is willing to let it go.

Saturday, August 1, 2015

Kachiabadi refugees wont be settled at Banigala

The Pakistan Tehreek-i-Ilzam Chairman, Captain Khan, has criticized the government for rendering hundreds of people homeless by razing their mud houses in Kachiabadi without relocating them to Banigala.

Without offering shelter to Katchiabadi refugees at vast lands in Banigala, Captain Khan said "Only the poor suffer the wrath of state power and this was reflected once again in the action taken against the residents of the Katchiabadi," and added that it was the leaders' duty to provide alternative housing to the poor families and move them there safely along with their belongings.

Captain Khan expressed shock at the brutal and violent manner in which the CDA bulldozed the Katchiabadi, leaving the poor families shelterless at nature’s mercy.

He reminded that Article 38, specifically 38d, of the Constitution states categorically that the state shall provide basic necessities of life including housing to all citizens, no matter they are national or not.

The information presented above is Fictitious, however, it is offered in Good Faith and Mostly Correct to the best of our knowledge. If any factual errors have appeared here inadvertently, then we would be pleased to hear from anyone wishing to offer corrections.